A bewildered morning after slough. Brown circles deepening around the eyes, a bruisy pallor in the cheeks. The air heavy with the musty smell of regret and shame. There in her bed was that narcotic friendly suckboy from last night. The one she thought looked like James Dean after 3 Sidecars, drooling on her pillowcase and reeking of gin. Gin is for pansies. What have I done with my life?
What was that anyway? Articulated cocktails? Really? Is that what we’re calling them now? Fat, smelly candles (unicorn fetlock & vetiver), garlic yogurt crusted octopus, “It’s Me, Margaret” artisanal tampons, and …. scratchy Joni Mitchell and Melanie records? Was she imagining it, or was everyone bespectacled in thick, oversized Warby Parkers? Their veneered super grins masquerading their mockery and bad-othering including their own friends at the bar. Wankers. Is there a way to live without irony, she wondered?
I’ll always love you Brooklyn, but my time is up.
Introducing I’m Done. The Pants.
With the spirit of fuck it woven into every fiber of these slouchy, effortless, outdated, non-ironic pants, you are free to dropout. These pants whisper, “You might think life is meaningful, but actually it is squalid and pointless and if you want proof, I’m it.
100% cotton
Size whatever
Marlene Deitrich style pants can be found on Etsy, but how about these: Marlene Dietrich Earrings
